There once was a time when space travel was such a significant achievement that for a person to accomplish it more than likely indicated a level of character rendering him or her exempt from ever being qualified to appear on "The Jerry Springer Show".Apparently, those days are over, as evinced by the kidnap-and-murder-attempting, diaper-wearing, git-yo-hands-off-my-man shenanigans of NASA astronaut Lisa Marie Nowak.
According to authorities, Nowak, a 43-year-old married mother of three, believed a woman named Colleen Shipman was a competitor for the affections of Navy Commander William Oefelein, an unmarried fellow astronaut. This Oefelein guy must be quite the catch, because Nowak drove 900 miles from Houston to Orlando to intercept Shipman at the airport (where Shipman was flying in from Houston) and--disguised in a wig and trench coat--try to carjack her with alternating tactics of crying and pepper spray. She never got a chance to use the BB gun, knife, steel mallet, rubber tubing and garbage bags she had also brought along before Shipman drove away and contacted the police.
In all of this, what truly makes Lisa Marie Nowak an American hero--someone little girls all over the country can really look up to--is that she wore a diaper for the entirety of her 900-mile drive so she wouldn't have to stop to go to the bathroom. I have many questions regarding Nowak's actions--why not fly to Orlando? what were the garbage bags for, Shipman's body or her own pride? instead of going after Shipman personally, why didn't she use her expertise as a robotics specialist to build a giant robot to attack the woman for her?--but the one tactic of hers that I understand completely was the use of the diapers.
That's just common sense.
