"Chris Hanley" is your answer? Are you sure?
Well, you're wrong: The man's name was actually Chris Haney. Now on to the next--
What? No... "Hanley" and "Haney" are two completely distinct words. Plus, it was for a pie piece...
Fuck you, I'm "cheating"! Don't bring Aunt Kathy into this! How about we have one fucking year where Thanksgiving isn't totally fucking ruined?!