Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Dos and Don'ts of Postponing a Presidential Campaign

DO: Mean it.

DON'T: Not mean it, get caught in your politically-motivated lie, then spend the next couple of weeks getting raked over the coals by David Letterman.

DO: It so that you can visit your sweet old grandma (who helped raise you) because she has fallen ill.

DON'T: Try to pretend that you have a grandma in a desperate attempt to keep pace with your opponent, for you might be as old as--if not older than--a large percentage of actual grandmas.

DO: Win.

DON'T: Lose. (But...black, gay, literate, female polar-bear-God-willing, Goofus...you will.)

1 comment:

-The Shiny Happy Mama- said...

The cartoon in this month's Highlights shows Goofus stealing a computer password and Gallant NOT reading his sister's diary. It's a fitting comparison with pretty much any topic - fruit, civil liberties, etc.