Barack Obama has won the Democratic nomination for President of the United States.
This makes me so hopeful and excited, I don't even have anything snarky to say.
Oh, wait--yes, I do...
Hillary: Shut up, concede, and start trying to be the vice-presidential candidate.*
*(Although that's never going to happen because you--what with your transparent phoniness combined with your attention-starved train wreck of a husband--are now more brutally divisive than a samurai sword through Glad Wrap.)