'Junior 2: Paternity Suit'

Good luck blaming this one on DeVito, ya jackwagon.

The Ballad of John Demjanjuk

[opening guitar strum]

Gather 'round and let me tell you the story of John Demjanjuk--

Ah, forget this. I can't rhyme anything with "Demjanjuk"; I'm not even sure how it's pronounced. But the dude apparently had a hand in killing like 28,000 people during the Holocaust. He's going to prison.

[closing guitar strum]

Ding, Dong (Etc.)

Nicely done, Mr. President.

Producing a falsely-doubted birth certificate and a highly-desired corpse makes for one hell of a week.