Thursday, March 27, 2008

Zero Hour Thrust Upon 'Chinese Democracy' by Fizzy Deliciousness

Just as my interest in when--if ever--Axl Rose's latest incarnation of Guns N' Roses was going to release their ten-years-in-the- works Chinese Democracy was threatening to dissipate into nothingness, I suddenly find myself caring about little else. Why?

Because I love Dr. Pepper, and I will get a free can of it if the album is released by the end of 2008.

Axl, please disregard the stunning lameness of Dr. Pepper's director of marketing's related quote--"We know once [Chinese Democracy is] released, people will refer to it as 'Dr Pepper for the ears' because it will be such a refreshing blend of rich, bold sounds"--focusing instead on the coolness of her name--Jaxie Alt (!)--spare us the coy responses and put out that goddamn record before January 1.

I promise I'll buy it within a decade after I finish my free soda.

[Photoshop fun courtesy of Exclaim.]

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