Sunday, July 13, 2008

America's Beer Now Made By Weirdo Foreigners

Baseball. Apple pie. Right-wing Christian fundamentalism. These are the things we think of when we think about what it means to truly be an American. But we care more about these things whenever we're drunk on beer--specifically, the most American of all beers: Budweiser.

Whose parent company, Anheuser-Busch, now belongs to some Belgians.

I don't know how American Jesus could have let this act of terrorism happen--and on the Sabbath, of all days--but you can bet yer ass no God fearin', truck drivin', NASCAR lovin', Toby Keith listenin', 2nd Amendment misappropriatin' REAL American will ever again let a drop of Budweiser touch his Made-in-the-USA lips.

Unless there's still going to be alcohol in it. Is there still going to be alcohol in it?

1 comment:

-The Shiny Happy Mama- said...

I will never go to Publick House again if, by virtue of geography, Budweiser ends up on their beer list. NEVER. That is the only worry I have about this buy-out.

Corporate greed is a fact of life, but shit beer is shit beer - regardless of geography.